I'm an overprotective mother to begin with. I read every news story that involves kids being harmed so that I can always be on top of the bad guys and have my kids prepared for every contingency I can think of. it drives my kids nuts and my Hubby. I know, I know, there's a small chance of something bad happening, but I never wanted to be the parent on the TV pleading for the return of my child because I needed a few minutes or I forgot to alert my kids to this or that. My Hubby has talked to me about this many times, you need to loosen the chain.
The question for me has been - Can you ever really BE to overprotective of your step-kids? I never wanted to be the wife telling her Hubby - I lost your child on my watch. Would he ever forgive me? Or the Ex-Wife who's just aching to find something I did wrong - "You WHAT- Lost my child.! I knew I should have never trusted you." So the hyper protection. Life seemed to go along ok and then as only Little Hart could do, pointed out the absurdity of what my over protection meant.
I had picked up Little Hart and her two friends from their last day of school. They were 12, not terribly young. They wanted to go to the movie. No big deal, except I still needed to pick up one of the other kids at 3:00 which meant they either didn't go to the movie or went by themselves and I picked them up after. After the million pleas for not ruining their last day of school I relunctantly agreed, but with a list of conditions which they agreed too.
- Don't talk to strangers -NO MATTER WHAT!
- Get your tickets, get treats and go straight to the theatre -DON'T TALK TO ANYONE
- Text when you get to your seats
- Don't go to the bathroom by yourself - GO TOGETHER
- Come straight out the front doors the minute the movie gets out and I will be waiting
Sounds pretty good, not to unreasonable? So everything went as planned. The kids walked out at the exact time the movie got out and jumped in the car. Relief they were safe. I said so how did it go? And Little Hart gave me the following response:
We went into the theatre and bought our tickets at the kiosk. Then we went up to get our treats. The lady asked us for our order and I pointed at my mouth that it had a lock and key. Used my hand to scribble a pencil and paper. The treat lady went and got a pen and paper. Handed it to me. I wrote "My Mom says I can't talk to strangers. " The lady says ok. You want to write your order. I shake yes with my head and write it down. The lady rings it up and says the total is $15.45. I write "just a minute my friend has the money in her SHOE." The lady says ok. I hand her the money and write "sorry my friends feet stink and the money probably smells." The lady smells the money and then puts It in the register and gives us our change back. I write "THANKS!"So we didn't talk to anyone!
Laughing hysterically, I said are you messing with me? She and her friends say in unison NOOO! You told us not to talk to any strangers and we DIDN'T. We just did what you told us to do.
Ok, message delivered maybe I've taken this thing a little overboard!
So in answer to my own question, yes you can be to overprotective with your step-kids. I've loosened the chain some, but it's still there. The good news is I haven't lost a KID Yet!